Nl East Report #2

Trenton: Game 1 - It looked like the Pirates were going down to defeat early in this one as the Ball Hogs scored 6 runs with 2 out in the 3rd. Home runs by Hunter Tomlinson and Max Crede erased the deficit in the 7th and Julian Giles' dinger and Albert Tapies double added insurance runs in the 8th as the Pirate pen shut down the Hogs potent attack. Rookie catcher, Thomas Baxter was asked about Randy Halladay's 3rd inning melt down, "I don't know really, we were cruising and all of a sudden, like ya know, he threw nothing but meatballs."

Game 2 - Kyle Forster's two run shot in the 8th erases a 1 run deficit to beat the Pirates for the first time this season. Pirate pitching is a little shell shocked after the game as they only gave up 5 hits and 2 walks, 3 of the hits were home runs.

Game 3 - Grant Simon pitched 6 solid innings before turning the 5 -3 lead over to the Pirate pen. However, the pen didn't hold the lead long as the Ball hogs fought back with everything they had. In the top of the 10th, Ben Riggs 2 run shot made the difference as Kory Governale got Rich Torres to fly out with the bases loaded in the bottom half of the inning. The game featured 22 runs on 30 hits, most of which came after the 6th inning.

Atlanta: Game 1 - The Pork n' Beans were cruising to a win until the fateful 6th inning affair. Yes, GM, Keebo, was thrown out in the 5th. As the Atlanta pen cried wolf in the 6th, 3 pitchers was used to try and stem the bleeding. Louis Bunch was brought in specifically to pitch to Randy Lamb, who had already hit a two run shot earlier. With the Mets now in the lead, it was decided they would pitch to Lamb but not give him anything to hit. However, the first pitch nailed Randy in the back that excited a bench clearing brawl, luckily only a little pride and a few bruises was the only hurt. In this reporters view, the pitch was deliberate and will there be suspensions?

Game 2 - Atlanta wins their 1st game as Bubba Rose goes 7 2/3 innings for the win. The PnB's pen averted disaster in the 9th as Randy Lamb grounded into a fielder choice and Jorge Nieves flied out with 2 runs in and the tying runs aboard. GM, Keebo, was not thrown out of game since his bench coach was on suspension for last nights altercations.

Game 3 - Mets melt in 6th inning as 9 PnB's score, but the damage could have been minimal if it wasn't for Tony Valenzuela 's misplay of a routine fly ball ( he said he tripped in a gopher hole). The play of the game was in the 4th inning though, as Harry Delgado's perfect throw from medium right field nailed Albert Chavez at home plate, who was trying to score from second base on a hit and run.

NL East Report

Channel 8 News Atlanta: Atlanta hosted Pittsburgh for a four game opening set. As Atlanta being the gracious host, the visiting Pirates translated that into a four game sweep, as Max Crede's grand slam sealed the victory in game 1. Game 2 saw each side taking batting practice against starting pitching, but a 9th inning melt down by PnB's Willard Farley sealed their fate allowing Hunter Tomlinson's three run blast. Game 3 shows why Turner Field is called the launching pad as Albert Tapies connected for 2 dingers, Gio Jackson and Max Crede each had 1 as the Pirates ran up the score. Game 4 saw the Pirates tag PnB's starting pitching for 4 runs early, but the bullpen struggled to hold the lead in the 9th. Pirate GM, Fire Sign, said "The league better take us seriously this year. We are hungry and we are good. There will be no melt down in the last third of the year this time around." Atlanta GM, SJR, had this to say "They have improved tremendously, more than I thought, but there are still 158 games to play and we will be there in the end!"

Next up for Atlanta: Home vs Mets
Next up for Pittsburgh: Away vs Ball Hogs

Channel 8 News Trenton: Trenton hosted the Mets for their opening four game set. In game 1 New York showed they have the talent it takes to win, as Hawk Reed gave up a seeing eye single in the 3rd inning to Marc Washburn allowing Otis Cannon to score for Trentons lone run. The first run scored under new GM WHOLCK tenure. Joey Yount's 3 run blast in the 6th ended any hope of a Ball Hog win. Game 2 saw the Ball Hogs come out with a vengeance as the Hogs teed off on starting pitcher, Olmedo Moreno, and the Met pen for 9 runs in the 3rd capped off by Kyle Forster's 2 run homer that erased a 2 run deficit. Game 3 was more of the same as as the Mets held it close till the 7th when Rich Torres's grand salami put it away, as a couple late runs by the Mets kept it from being a shutout. Game 4 saw the Mets unleash their hitting prowess scoring 13 times total as Jorel Woodson pitched 5 shutout innings giving up two lonely hits and striking out 5. Mets GM, Keebo, said "We have the talent, it just needs to be more consistent." Ball Hogs GM, WHLOCK, had a more sombering statement "I am not sure what we have in all reality, but it looks like we are not to be taken lightly."

Next up for New York: Away vs Pork n' Beans
Next up for Trenton: Home vs Pirates

Reporting for Channel 8 News: Barbara WaaWaa

2nd Bonus Baby IFA inks deal

Aireball3 can now get off his knees from praying and pleading as the Athletics signed stud pitcher Joseph Wang to a minor league contract. Several clubs made substantial offers for Joeseph but he seemed to like the city of Brotherly Love more than the Windy City. GM Aireball3 was seen doing an Irish Jig (or was that break dancing, hard to tell the difference with him) after the Athletics downed the Boston Red Sox for the second consecutive night and a very private party ensued. Is this the year the Athletics live up to their capabilities and beat out rwilson and them thar yanks? Reporting live, Barbara WaaWaa, Channel 8 News.

Deuce Droppers Season Preview

Key Additions: Pascual Cruz

Departures: Jacque Nixon

C: Pascual Cruz - Once again, the DD’s will look to a Rule 5 player to handle the catching duties. Cruz was claimed off waivers after being taken from the Pilots in the draft by the Multiple Spouses. He is out to show both those teams that they made a big mistake in letting him go. He is not the best defender or pitch caller, but has great potential at the plate.

1B: B.C. Bennett – In his first full season in the majors, B.C. hit 31 HR’s with 103 RBI’s and a .294 Avg. At just 23 years of age, he should be anchoring the middle of the DD’s lineup for years to come. Little known fact, Bennett was given his nickname by Dwight Johnson’s sister after she could not handle his large bat, B.C. = Big Cock.

2B: Jim Edmonds – The longtime CF for the DD’s, not the washed up OF playing for the Cubs, Edmonds was moved to 2B after the season ending injury to Jacque Nixon. He flourished in his new position and finished with 30 HR’s, 98 RBI’s, 117 Runs, 52 SB’s, and a .292 Avg. At 28 years of age and in a midst of a contract year, he may have his best year yet.

3B: Blake Mathews – After clearing waivers at the beginning of spring training last year, Mathews decided to make every team regret the decision not to pick him up. How did he do, how about 49 HR’s, 139 RBI’s, 104 Runs and a respectable .265 Avg. He effectively gave all 31 teams the finger for passing on him.

SS: Will Yeats – The great-grandson of the Irish poet William Butler Yeats, he is known as the black sheep of the family for choosing baseball over a literary career. Yeats was called up to the big leagues as a result of Jacque Nixon going down for the year. Everyone knew that Yeats could play a mean SS, but no one expected the offense that he contributed. He finished the year with 10 HR’s, 49 RBI’s, and a .289 Avg in 113 games.

LF: Jorel Atkins – As the illegitimate son of the creator of the Atkins diet, the only meat that Jorel will not eat is the rotten tuna between the legs of Dwight Johnson’s sister. Started the year as the #2 hitter in the lineup, but after a slow start was moved to the #9 spot. He flourished in his new spot and finished with 25 HR’s, 93 RBI’s, 126 Runs, 64 SB’s, and a .271 Avg.

CF: Jimmie Bergman – Bergman had been the DD’s SS all his career, but was a part of the defensive shift that resulted from Nixon’s injury. Bergman had 38 HR’s, 107 RBI’s, 101 Runs and a .282 Avg.

RF: Vin Ibanez – Vin had another great year from the leadoff spot setting the table for the big sticks behind him and was rewarded with a 5 year, 32.5 million dollar contract in the offseason. He finished with 4 HR’s, 72 RBI’s, 106 Runs, 54 SB’s, and a .316 Avg.

DH: Fernando Armas – His MVP days are probably behind him, but Armas is still one of the most feared hitters in the league. He finished the season with 17 HR’s, 100 RBI’s, 33 SB’s, and a .376 Avg.

Reserves: C – Chris O'Donnell, 1B/DH – Keith Reid, IF/OF – Andrew Waters

After losing his boyish good looks to plastic surgery gone wrong, O’Donnell left Hollywood and now hides behind his catcher’s mask. It’s rumored that he haunts the bowels of Deuce Dropper stadium, a la the Phantom of the Opera.

SP1: Britt Swindell - Britt, son of former major leaguer Greg Swindell, is the teams ace. He had a solid season last year finishing 16 – 10 with a 3.51 era. This season Britt hopes to win his third CY Young award.

SP2: Russell Spence - Spence moves up to the number 2 spot this season. He was solid last season going 15 – 8 with a 3.80 era.

SP3: Chad Sanders - Sanders, brother of fictional 90210 character Steve Sanders, will start as the teams #3. This fprmer CY Young winner hopes to continue the success he had last season. Last season he was 14 – 9 with a 3.30 era in 32 starts.

SP4: Nicholas Perry - Illegimate brother of 90210 star Luke Perry returns as the teams #4. Perry is a reliable vet who has started 32 in each of his last 4 seasons. Last season he finished 13 – 12 with a 4.55 era.

SP5: Marty Stoops - Stoops spent most of last season in AAA going 8 – 8 with a 3.77 era. He was 3 – 0 in 3 starts last season in the majors.

LR: Hipolito Palacios - Future ace of the team. This 20 year old returns for his second season in the majors. Palacios was stellar in the playoffs last season with a 2.35 era in 15 innings.

LR: Dwayne Charleston - Charleston was decent last season. He was great in the playoffs managing a 3 – 0 record in only 3 innings.

LR: Victor Mendoza - The team has been waiting for Mendoza to develop into a sold reliever. This should be his first full season in the majors. Last season he had a 3.34 era in 86 innings in AAA.

LR: Donald Tanaka - The teams former #5 starter moves to the bullpen. If he struggles expect to see him traded or on the waiver wire.

SU: Victor Blanco - Blanco was brought over from the Brewers last season. He was solid for the team with a 1.17 era in 15 innings.

SU: Doug Cambridge - Cambridge has been solid for the past few seasons. Last season he had 18 saves in 19 opportunities with a 3.20 era.

SU: Mark Carew - Carew hopes to improve in his second season in the majors. Last season he had a 4.65 era in 40 innings.

SU: Jeremy Russell - The virtually useless Russell pitched 25 innings last season with a 5.96 era.

Salt Lake City Multiple Spouses Team Preview

Position Players - Starters

C - Tom Norton - excellent game management skills and plenty of power. Underperformed last season, but this is his walk year so management expects a big year from him.

1B - Jeffrey Abbott - hits for average with a little pop. Last season was hist first in the majors with a BA under .300. If age is catching up with Abbott, rule V pickup, John prinz appears ready to take over 1B

2B - Yamid Maranon - Management traded veteran 2B Al sanchez and blue chip C prospect Brett Perez to get Maranon during the off-season. Hopefully he'll prove to be worth it.

3B - Hayes Carasone - The Spouses expect big things from Carasone this season.He's got speed, a good eye and decent power. On top of that he is capable of gold glove type D at the hot corner

SS - Wes Kelly - Kelly was acquired during the off season to make the routine plays at short. The Spouses expect a .260 - ,270 average and 12 -15 dingers from him.

LF - Patsy Wheeler - veteran and team leader Wheeler should provide his capable D and a .280 average and 30 or so homers

CF - Jeff Brooks - Brooks was the favorite for the ROY award last season until he ran out of gas about 3/4 of the way through the season. Still his final numbers were impressive. .269 batting average, 34 homers, 46 steals, 100 runs scored and 96 RBIs. His gold glove caliber D in CF doesn't hurt either. The scary part is(at least for oppsoing teams) he's only going to get better

RF - Zephyr Roosevelt - another steady veteran presence, Roosevelt has plenty of talent to go with his cool name

Bench - Jacob Dale, Jeff Nixon, Fred Wilson, Harold bennett and John Prinz provide a versatile and good hitting bench.

Starting Pitching
Howard Barkley - Barkley has yet to live up to his potential. he has nasty stuff, good control and is durable. He has yet to put it all together and have the type of season the Spouses hope for from him.

AJ Davis - Davis was the Cy young favorite at the all star break last season. After partying too hard when he made the all star team, he had an awful second half.

Rob Cambridge - another guy who has trouble living up to his ratings

Justin Sadler - he performed exactly as expected last seaason. Hopefully he can be a very good 34 starter again this season

Vic Rogers - see above...same applies to Rogers

Bullpen
Peter Thomas is a dependable long reliever. He'll keep his team in the game if a starter falters early

JT Witt - Witt needs to perform better this season or he'll be looking for another job

Jorge Owen - a tough, dependable set up guy. Especially tough on right handers

Earl Miller - the Closer job is his to lose. has all the talent in the world, but he blwe 33% of his save opportunities last season, which is not impressive. The Spouses are hoping he'll be better with some experience under his belt.

Erubiel Beltre - if Miller can't cut it, beltre will be ready to reclaim his closer job.

All in all, the Multiple Spouses are looking to contend this season.

There are also rumors of a blockbuster deal in the works to bring a #1 starter to the Spouses

First Bonus Baby IFA inks deal

After intense negotiations and a free-for-all by 10 different clubs that left 3 hospitalized, Rico Polonia inks deal for 16.5M with the Iowa City Hawkeyes. Other than an ecstatic GM bcbifflefan, complete details are a little sketchy. bcbifflefan was asked why so much and his reply was " The kid is better than anyone on our roster anywhere!" He does have great control and posseses 3 outstanding pitches, but the splits are worrysome in this reporters view. Also more champagne corks popped later as Iowa City downed Seattle, 6-7, in the clubs season debut. "Reporting live, this is Barbra WaaWaa Channel 8 News.

Houston Astros

After coming out of nowhere to win a franchise high 93 games last season the Houston Astros have playoffs hopes for the first time. Entering their third year under new management the new GM was active once again. After trading away 9 minor league players during the off season the Astros acquired a new starting CF, a utility man, and the future of the franchise Everett Hill. The Astros appear loaded but face an uphill battle in the always stacked NL. In order for the Astros to make the playoffs their aging bullpen must hold up and their players must put the Miguel Tejada incident behind them.

Projected Starting Lineups/Batting Order:

RF Sid Bryant - After winning the ROY Award in Season 6 Sid battled testicular cancer during Season 7. As the Chemotherapy took its toll Sid saw his batting average fall like his white blood cell count, ending the season hitting a meager .277. Fitted with a new custom cup, Sid figures to bounce back to his rookie season form.

2B Jim Wise - Forrest Gump here is a speedster from Oklahoma. Wise stole 50 bases last year off of 88 hits. Even with The Man changing the settings, Wise hopes to be the catalyst for the Astros monster lineup.

1B Rocky Spencer - The undisputed Captain of the team, Rocky hopes to be in the MVP conversation at the end of the season. A great hitter with a great eye, Rocky struck out only 30 times last season and hit 43 bombs. If Rocky can live up to his talent the Astros may be able to grab a playoff spot.

LF Heinie Watkins - What is there to say about Fat Boy that hasn’t been said already? Still young, still a beast, still better than you. The first player in HBD history to sprain his ankle after catching a fly ball Fat Boy hopes to raise his RF above 1.29.

C Juan Santiago - Juan is perhaps the team’s most consistent player. Last year he won a Silver Slugger Award and was selected to the All Star team. Not know for his defense or his ability to manage a game, Juan has some of the best splits you will ever see.

CF Rafael Almanzar - Acquired during the offseason for 3 minor league players, the AL Right Field silver slugger last season hopes to make an impact on his new team. The Astros hope Rafael can raise his batting average and improve on his stellar power numbers even further.

SS Jamie Xaio- After contract negotiations with the Astros broke down during the off season it looked as though Xiao may have been heading back to the Japanese Leagues. Xiao’s greedy agent and bossy wife insisted that he be paid over seven million dollars in arbitration or over six million a year for four years. This price tag scared off all possible suitors during the free agent negotiation period. However, after half of Spring training had elapsed, a mysterious death, and a timely deportation, Xiao agreed to sign with the Astros for a little more than four million dollar for one season.

3B Giovanni Young - Giovanni has won his opportunity to start at 3B this season, albeit by default. Giovanni is a steady hitter and has a cool name.


Bench

C Gregory McMillan - Forgot about him.

2B Gregory McMillan - With a 35 health rating the Astros have concluded that Lackey has the AIDS.

CF Santos Bolivar- Last years starting CF Santos hopes to bring a spark off the bench.

SS Santos Bolivar- Peter is an ideal utility man and should be a good fill in for any injured player.



Projected Pitching Staff

Starters:

SP1 Dan Hitchcock - Dan’s stuff is so dirty you can’t even say his name in World Chat. The Astros are hoping Dan can become an ace now that he is 25 years old.

SP2 Willie Espinosa* - Fireballer Willie Espinosa has nearly squandered his entire 18 million dollar signing bonus and is already looking for his next contract. The pride of the Astros’ GM, Willie is expected to do great things and will be given every opportunity he needs.

SP3 Steve Crow - Now a full year away from a devastating injury that ruined Steve’s career the Astros are still hoping that he can become a solid pitcher. With an increased training budget, but without his buddy Miguel Tejada to help Steve inject those pesky B12 shots in his arse, Steve’s health will be a question mark yet again.

SP4 Clay Griffith - Clay is a winner. Nothing about him will blow you away but he managed to win 14 games last season, the most on the Astros staff.

SP5 Tuck Buck - Tuck may not be the best pitcher in the league. Tuck may not be a Cy Young winner. Tuck may not even be an All Star, yet he sure is paid like one. And despite Tuck preferring Dwight Johnson’s brother over his sister he still has more money than all of us.

Bullpen:
LR Graham Maxwell - Graham is a solid relief pitcher who won 11 games out of the pen last year. Expect him to be solid yet again.

LR Ralph Erickson Nicknamed Over Rated, the best thing Ralph can do for the Astros is bring them a draft pick as a free agent at the end of the season.

LR Edgar Trajano - Platinum Recording Artist Edgar Trajano is know as ‘The King of Tejano’ in his native land of Lincoln Alabama.

SU Louie Lee - Plain and simple Louie Lee deserved to be the NL Cy Young winner. The Astros simply hope that he doesn’t turn to dust sometime during the season. He is old.

SU Wiki Plata - Good name.

SU Gaylord Ward - Hah!


Closer Vinny Post - Vinny showed promise in season 6 as a rookie, but just like Sid, Vinny struggle last season. His ERA jumped from 3.82 to 7.78. He blew to many saves and needs to improve this year or he may lost the closer job and possibly find himself in Kansas City.



Outlook:

Health seems to be the biggest problem for the Astros. Management took notice and spent 18 million on Health and 18 million on Training. The Astros’ biggest problems are something they can’t do anything about, the Reds, the Marlins, the Cubs, and the Swingers. The Astros played well against these teams, won 93 games, and still missed out on a playoff spot by 7 games. Chances are they will win 99 games this season and miss out on a playoff berth by 1 game.